Slowly, Surely, Beautifully: An Italian Proverb for a Full Life
Since I found it so enjoyable to write last week’s article, I thought I would explore a proverb from another culture I adore. Rich with history, marvelous art, lovely people, and delightful food, Italian culture moves at its own pace. Slowly enjoying a cappuccino at a café, strolling through breathtaking piazzas, and savoring long meals with friends are quotidian delights. It is unsurprising that I could stumble upon a motto beautifully simple, yet thoroughly convincing. The proverb goes, “chi va piano, va sano e va lontano,” translating to “he who goes slowly, goes healthily, and goes far.” This can most closely be compared to the English proverb “slow and steady wins the race.” Perhaps it is the rhythm of the language, but I find myself drawn to the Italian phrasing! This saying is not merely about pace, but about the kind of life we build when we resist urgency in favor of intention.
Our Desire for Immediate Fulfillment
Sadly, the life I just described seems almost incompatible with the world we live in today. In a world that never sleeps, many of us find ourselves constantly racing to get ahead. It doesn’t help that contemporary living offers little opportunity for waiting. With food, clothing, and even conversation available instantly, and algorithms designed to keep us constantly engaged, we are rarely required to sit in anticipation. How might this affect long-term thinking? Could this affect our ability to approach life with patience?
In a book I couldn’t put down, Dopamine Nation, Dr. Anna Lembke discusses this very premise, that modern life has rewired our brains to prioritize immediate dopamine hits over slow, meaningful rewards. Human psychology has been exploited, leaving many defenseless against the constant pull towards instant gratification. This need for a quick reward eventually leads to less pleasure coming from normal activities, lower motivation to pursue long-range goals, and less tolerance for delay or discomfort.
Interestingly enough, our short-term desires can be at odds with our hopes for the future. Contemporary living is alluring, reminding us that any discomfort can quickly be pacified with momentary pleasure. Living mindfully then begins to sound boring, something we tell ourselves we can do after we’ve had our fun.
When Everything is Instant, Ordinary Life Feels Dull
It is not an exaggeration to say that we live in an attention economy. Online content has evolved to be increasingly radical to engage our shorter attention spans. To billions of viewers, activities like skydiving in Abu Dhabi or yachting on the Amalfi Coast, start to become the standard to which they compare their lives. Everywhere we look, there seems to be someone, somewhere living “our dream.” When we see sparkling content, frequently, our own day to day activities such as grocery shopping, going for a walk, and working, start to feel dull.
As a result, teens and young adults' aspirations are being warped by the continuous stream of fascinating pictures and videos. According to Morning Consult, 57% of Gen Z has an interest in becoming influencers. I presume this could have something to do with the access that online fame gives to luxurious travel, exclusive networks, and once-in-a-lifetime opportunities. We are seeing young influencers rapidly accumulate wealth that usually takes decades to build. This window into the lives of successful strangers causes us to expect quick success for ourselves.
The idea of waiting ten years for something that we want now is far less appealing. However, many of the most rewarding experiences in life take time to unfold such as forming a healthy inner world, developing a romantic relationship, or having a family. What all of these have in common is that they are life-long journeys. They are not usually attained overnight.
(S)he Who Goes Slowly
It is here that the wisdom of the proverb becomes more compelling. Rooted in traditional Italian culture, this adage reflects a way of life before fast-paced modernity. It emphasizes sustainability and the health of interpersonal relationships, valuing process over outcome. Contrary to modern American culture, the Italian proverb insinuates that vitality is a priority over material wealth or success. This seems unthinkable in a society where 60 hour workweeks are worn like a badge of honor and sacrificing personal relationships for status is viewed as incidental.
“Chi va piano, va sano e va lontano” invites us to reconsider what fullness of life truly looks like. Culture may say otherwise, but the foundation of goodness is found in our relationships. Humans are wired for connection—a biological need that cannot be ignored. While there are temporary substitutes, nothing can take the place of genuine bonds with God, family, friends, and ourselves.
This wisdom extends beyond human relationships. Communion with God offers a steady source of peace, insight, and love, regardless of circumstance. Still, closeness with Him is not formed passively, but cultivated through intention, prayer, time in scripture, and the embodiment of godly principles in everyday life. Just as we would not expect to stay close with a friend we rarely speak to, our relationship with God deepens through consistency and care.
Similarly, closeness with family, whether by blood or chosen, fulfills a deep need we have to experience life with others and share our thoughts, dreams, and fears. Friendship is one of the most powerful gifts in life, bringing us out of isolation and into a sense of belonging. No matter the stage in life, connection is grounding and life giving. Our friends support us, hold us accountable, and offer wisdom far beyond what we could grasp alone.
Our relationships sustain us in ways that ambition alone cannot. As women, many of us feel drawn toward achievement, sometimes at the expense of what is far more enduring. Health extends beyond what we eat or accomplish, reaching into the state of our mind, spirit, and the depth of our relationships. To go “lontano,” to go far, is to nurture these areas with care, knowing that a life rooted in love will extend far beyond what we can see.
Blessings Around the Corner
In order to experience what truly makes life worth living, we will have to experience periods of waiting, growing pains, and ambiguity. Since these are unavoidable, we may as well make friends with them. The delay of something meaningful in life does not mean it will never come, but can instead lead to a path of growth in community, enjoyment of the present, and trust in God’s timing.
Consider what matters most in your life, and don’t hold it quietly. Bring it to God, share it with those you trust, and allow yourself to be supported in living it out. Do not rush this journey of life. Go slowly, go well, and trust that in time, you will go far.